Peeling Layers of Perception

I have always been interested in consciousness and the practices around it. For this reason I started to cultivate awareness early. I still have a long way to go, but I have made some progress. Through the years I realized it is about peeling layers of perception. Here are a few thoughts about it.

Starting out, exposing my compulsions amplified them and made me more subseptible to them. Because increasing awareness increases sensitivity, so you notice those impulses both more often and more intensly.

These are memories of reactionary interpreations that prevent you from seeing the world for what it is. They were instaurated when you decided what is ok and what is not ok. Adhering to that identity means that when something is not ok your identity is in contrast with it. That disturbance is pain.

To avoid those disturbances we create an armor of behaviors. Avoiding pain limits the possible experiences so much that it will be what you do most of the time without being aware. We are much more shaped by our defence mechanisms than we realize. In fact a lot of life is run by pain avoidance.

If you cultivate awareness in everyday life you won’t be able to unsee it. Habits are automatized reactions to triggers. Your reactions are past choices repeated when triggered by the associated mental state.

Those reactions are a kind of search for an external relief. Looking for external solutions is common, seeking pleasure is a classic. But as you go deeper you won’t be able to unsee the fact that pleasure doesn’t give satisfaction. Because it doesn’t give closure, that’s why you can’t get enough, and you get into sticky loops.

The "solution" is entirely found inside. Relying on external solutions makes them become preconditions you think necessary. When they re lacking they become prohibition.

But what is internal can always be seen. Awareness is always accessible, in every moment. It can be cultivated at any time.

One of its benefits is that it slows down both you and your perception of time. Slowness is beneficial to big decisions, deep thinking and enjoyment. Being fast gives you the excitatory, stimulating enjoyment of the chase, that is good. But when in that mode everything not relevant to the chase becomes noise. Slowing down gives you the headspace to be able to enjoy a piece of art or the company of another person.

Going slow is necessary to cultivate awareness daily. That’s how you can notice holes of unconscious habit, compulsion or consumption to be filled by deliberateness. This is the way to gradually liberate yourself of the old decisions with new ones. Removing the inhibitory chains built to avoid pain and unconditionally experiencing whatever life has to offer. You start experiencing reality rather than consuming it.

Initially this practice of continuous deepening of average awareness backfired. Awareness became monitoring and compulsive checking. Introspection became analysis so through that action got inhibited. So there is such a thing as being too aware.

But these were my old patterns finding new ways to stay alive. The mind can be tricky and awareness can be a great weapon against it. But eventually what worked best was working with it rather than against it.

The practice of undoing your own tying takes time and patience. But results will come. What I got from practiting awareness is higher awareness average that gives me access to broader perceptive bandwidth.

This is paired with the ability to enter deep focus that is both calm and alert. That kind of flow is one of the best states the mind can offer in my opinion. It is formless in the sense that you can become the subject of your attention. It is a good way to generate and externalize rather than accumulating internalized input.

Overall perception is deeper, finer and richer. This increases the sharpness and clarity of my experience and performance. Because the practice of awareness keeps you closer to the ground impulses and perceptions. Overriding filters and automations, Allowing access to intuition.

This happens because you interveene less in your perception. Meaning you see things for what they are rather than how you want them to be. Being unassuming keeps awareness open. This is how you keep seeing the raw sensory data of the world, rather than its memory.

Other than constantly filling unconscious habitual automations with awareness as I notice them there are other practices that have worked very well for me. What has made the most difference has been fasting, diet and meditation.

I only eat in strictly designated windows because the fasting state makes my perception clearer and more intense. In particular my ability to recognize patterns is enhanced. I drink a lot, replenish electrolytes and caffeine.

Regarding diet what works best for me is very low carb, high protein and high fat, all coming from whole foods. I keep it extremely simple. This kind of diet keeps me stable throughout the day.

Meditation is perhaps the most important practice, even though fasting and diet are non-trivial multipliers. I usually do vipassana meditation to increase my interoception, which seems to sharpen my sensory perception. But when I am too grounded and I need to focus I do some practices to prime exteroception.

Overall the most potent benefit for me personally, other than enhanced perception is being free of form when in deep focus. Becoming the thing you are doing and learning is liberating.

Notes